Hitchin' A Ride
by Hikaru Morinaga
Summary: WARNING: VERY RANDOM. Link, Marth, and Roy have to hitch hike to the mansion in time for happy hour! What insanity will insue? You tell me! Based off Hitchin' A Ride by Green Day.


**Hitchin' A Ride**

Hey all! Min here. How are y'all? Ahem. I know I have written in this fandom for a while... but I haven't been able to.

So… uh, enjoy? There's not much to say here.

Oh, and any reviews I get will be responded to in my livejournal (http / www. Live journal . com / users / sailorvfan10 just remove the spaces and add what you need to.), for those of you who review. Uh, yeah, that's about it.

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Link, Roy and Marth were walking along a road that they had no clue where the heck It led to. Why? Well, Roy crashed the car (that Roy stole) into a telephone pole, that's why. So, what else but hitch hike?

Link showed his thumb at the highway, but no one would stop.

"Stupid oafs," he said, crossing his arms.

"It would be easier if there… was… a lady," Roy said, looking at Marth.

Marth sighed.

"I hate you both."

Marth went to the edge of the sidewalk along the highway and showed off his leg. Immediately someone stopped.

"Hey mister, where you headed?" the man in the truck driver asked the trio (but was mostly talking to Marth).

"Uh, well, my comrades and I are stranded, and we need a lift to the mansion," the blue headed swordsman said, pointing behind him.

"Are you in a hurry?" the truck driver asked after nodding.

"Like I said, I need a lift to-"

"Happy hours going on tonight at the mansion, Marth, and I'd hate to miss it!" Roy said, interrupting.

"Say, that's not a bad idea," the truck driver named Andy said, seeing the two other swordsmen go nuts behind poor Marth.

'Oh no,' Marth thought.

"But, I'm in a rush to deliver this drum set to someone in California, so I'm 'fraid I can't help you," Andy said.

"Better luck next time," he said, driving off.

Shortly after a family of four pulled over.

"Do you break for distilled spirits?" Roy asked, pleading with them. After all, happy hour was two hours away… and he'd be VERY pissed off if he missed it.

"I need a break as well," Marth muttered, sitting on a randomly placed rock.

"The well is drying up!" Link said, watching a well across the road dry up.

"It probably inebriates guilt," Marth said, patting Link on the shoulder.

"1, 2, 1, 2, 3, 4…" Link said, watching random ants on the bench.

The family of four, aka the Armstrong's, rolled down the window.

"Well, the turkey's getting stale, Bill," his wife Adrienne said, pointing to the turkey sandwiches in the trunk.

"Tonight I'm eating crow. It tastes good," Roy said.

"And they will serve the crow at Happy Hour. If we ever get there."

Marth said, "Fermented salmonella poison's probably gonna be on it by the time we-" "GET THERE," Link said, near tears because he stepped on an ant.

"Ack, no," Roy said.

Marth was getting tired of a near plotless story.

"There's a drought at the fountain of youth, and now I'm dehydrating… and if I don't get home soon I'm going to shoot someone."

Roy said, "My tongue is swelling up… from lack of water…"

Link watched as the family of four drove off.

"Aww, shit."

"I'm off the wagon and I'm hitchin' a ride…"

So, they kept walking along… slowly, everyone stopped moving (except them) all together.

"What the fuck?" Roy said, poking a random guy that looked like a cross between Mike Dirnt and Ryan Stiles with his sword.

All of the sudden, music came on. They had no clue where, but it might've been coming from the author's computer.

"We walk a lonely road, the only one that we've ever known," Roy said, walking up to random people and poking them.

"We still don't know where it goes, but it's…"

The music stopped.

"Are we at happy hour yet?" Roy asked after an hour.

"Almost, Roy. Almost."

Link saw the mansion.

"Holy shit, lookie at that!"

They ran for it.

But not before more music came on.

"… Min's gonna be sued," Marth said, batting away fangirls.

"Nah. She changed some of the lyrics. It's not really a song fic."

"Besides," Roy said, batting away fangirls with Sword of Seals. "We didn't sing anything. We spoke everything."

HAPPY HOUR.

"YAY CROW!"

**End

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**

… Uh, and just to let you know, I don't own "Hitchin' a Ride" or "Boulevard of Broken Dreams", even though I changed the words to the latter and used dialogue with the former.

… Even so, no one was singing anything.

Uh, the aforementioned songs belong to Green Day, and you should know that by now.

And yes, the story was quite random. I hope it was funny!

Feedback is appreciated.


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